Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions. ~Oliver Wendell HolmesNew term. I have a desk bowing under curriculum & our umbrella school has a list of requirements that must be met. There are books to be read, maps to be mapped, diagrams & quizzes, outcomes to meet & goals that have been set & all just for Ditz but sometimes I wonder why I bother. I really do.
We should be unschoolers. I can't; I just can't, ok. Unschooling is way to scary but unschooling is what we should do because in amongst all the *required* stuff there is the other agenda; the Ditz agenda. You heard me correctly. That would be the school~is~boring~I~don't~want~to do~that~do~I~have~to? Ditz.
I actually sort of like this other Ditz. This Ditz is a mini~me with a lot more sass. I gotta wonder about this child though. In the middle of church the child turns to me & goes, 'This is what I want to learn about this term.' Not the time!
Besides, I think scratching my head over her *list*, we've done Roman Numerals. However I think when we did Roman Numerals Ditz didn't have a purpose for them & let them fall through the holes in her head. She's got plenty of those so they disappeared fast. Now, however, Ditz is cross because she can't work out which chapter she's in in all those books that use Roman Numerals instead of regular ones & naturally it is all my fault because why didn't I make her learn them back in the day? Why indeed? Couldn't possibly have anything to do with my student by any chance? Hm? Hm?
OK, so we get to learn about Roman Numerals ~ again. I can do Roman Numerals. It's algebra I think is stupid & incomprehensible but then I don't want to build things where I have to guess anything. Then my beautiful, wonderful, sassy, intelligent Ditz turns to me & says, 'And gypsies. I want to learn about Gypsies.' Not a problem. I can do Gypsies. I wait. There's always a catch to these things & one day, when Ditz goes, I bet you don't know, she will be right. I won't know...but it wasn't yesterday.
'I bet you don't know what Gypsies were first called?' Egyptians. Ditz is used to me & not about to be defeated at the first hurdle. She has armed herself with spare ammunition. 'Well, I bet you don't know what else they were called?' Zyganni. Romany. [Yeah, I know. It's sad the stuff I know.] 'Well, I bet you didn't know...' but what my bright, intelligent, witty, sassy Ditz hasn't quite fathomed yet, because the prospect is just too horrifying, is that her mind is very like mine; A small matter of genetics which belongs to that other field of little interest to Ditz, science.
I can probably tell her more off the top of my head about gypsies than she'll ever want to know ~ & for the same reasons as she's interested. It the thick [very think] A4 spiral~back notebook, one of several floating around this house & marked PRIVATE in large letters & decorated with skulls & crossbones & threats of what will happen to anyone who disregards the PRIVATE warning is The Book! This is Ditz's best seller a la Harry Potter [& probably derived from that source] & about to send me broke keeping my wanna be author supplied in lined notepaper. She hasn't worked her way up to the keyboard & ink stage yet.
People, I am drowning in paper but do you think I can worm one intsy~teensy tiny bit of creative writing out of Ditz to send in with her English work? Nope! Not a one. Boring. Dull. The sad thing is I get this. I actually really, really do. See paragraph 6. Actually, sadly, I get a lot of Ditz. Why should she have to do math she will never use because it is supposed to be good for her? Why should she write book reports when she will never write another book report in her life? Mind you I'm not allowed to nab one of her CV's [that she's put together all by herself] for the non~fiction aspect of her English either. Why should she share a work in progress? She knows as well as I do sharing an unfinished work kills it deader than a doornail. Frankly, Ditz's agenda is far more intrinsically interesting than the set curriculum ~ & far more useless. That's the rub, isn't it? All the really interesting stuff is completely useless. I mean, what do you do with a lot of extraneous knowledge about gypsies & the life cycles of dragons? Oh, right, you write best sellers. *smacks head* Silly me!