Monday, August 6, 2012
"If you think practicing what you preach is rough, just try preaching what you practice." ~ Baxter, Bowen
Besides the Star doing her starry thing we have had a car on the blink again. Not fun with our early morning temps hovering around 4 degrees C.
I have been wading through assignments ~ some with more enthusiasim than others. Sadly Evangelism 1~o~1 is never going to be my favourite subject. I understand but I hate the practical element & it has been driven home with a vengance this fortnight.
Firstly the practical witness day was a shocker. Unbeknown to us we hit one of the most spiritually resistant shopping centres around. I sensed this through the spirit but academic that I am I was focused on meeting the critea for the assignment instead of listening to what the Spirit was actually telling me. Duh! I know. I know. I'm a little slow that way sometimes.
Anyway, having beaten myself up over yet another witnessing failure I was given the opportunity to preach again. Seriously, mousy little me who thinks people have the right to go to hell if that's what they want without being badgered as they go about their own business, has no problems getting up in front of a crowd & proclaiming. I just don't. Everything I've been told about the street witness happens for me when I preach. I know the anointing is on me. It is tangible. I sense the presence of the Holy Spirit so strongly I literally start "quaking" ~ an experience the early Quakers were very familiar with! I know I have a calling on my life to do this ~ which helps enormously! None of which stops me getting in a tizz prior but as soon as I stand to speak the anointing is there & with it comes incredible focus, the peace that passes all understanding & the sense that I am exactly where God wants me to be doing exactly what He wants me to do.
Just the same one of the reasons I am in bible school just now is to do with preaching. God wanted me to change the way I went about things because being academically minded I did my reasearch. I noted all my reference verses. I wrote down exactly what I wanted to say & I timed it for exactly the 20 minutes I am usually allowed. I know how to do public speaking from notes. I have all the moves down pat. The thought of trying to do all that without my stalwat bits of paper did not make me a happy me ~ & yet that is exactly what God wanted me to do: Ditch my handy bits of paper & get up close & personal. Oh. My.
I knew I was to speak on the Holy Spirit. I can rabbit on about the Holy Spirit ad infinitum! I nearly did. I love how the Lord leads & the good things that happen when He is in control. He showed me how to lead with questions so that I had people thinking & engaging, not just sitting back like stunned mullet. And he had me practically in the front rows laps! Um, yeah....
Dino, who came along, had some good pointers on things I need to do a bit differently another time but he seemed to think it went ok. I can never tell. I am so caught up in conveying what God wants said I'm not cognizant of much else.
The first time you try something new is always the roughest ~ & we haven't done Preaching 1~0~1 yet! I expect there's a lot of room for improvement. I expect I will learn something new. Meanwhile if God is prepared to work with me as I am, I am prepared to speak his word. With boldness even. And with great joy.