The Discipline of the Lord.

For the Lord disciplines the one he loves & chastises every son whom He receives. Hebrews 12:6.

Discipline is not the same as punishment. Often it is training. Liddy, who has been walking a lonely path of uncertainty & bewilderment, is learning about the discipline of the Lord. I, who am not called to walk this path, have inspired her ire by saying she is lucky , the Lord's hand is so clearly upon her guiding & directing & isn't it exciting?! I think it has been a little too exciting lately.

Now I do not know how other families do these things but in ours, as the girls have got older & their spiritual awareness & their relationship with God has developed independently & deepened, we use each other to discern God's will & direction. I have had an appalling week spiritually. Most of what God has been trying to show me I still haven't discerned properly but it has certainly given me nightmares & plenty of disrupted sleep. One thing at least was relatively clear. I did feel the Lord was saying quite plainly Liddy was not to replace her car. In one foul swoop God simply removed Liddy's independence, her status symbol, her escape route, her ability to gad about the place with ease & a monetary drain while preserving her life. Church & friends ~ gone. When I finally plucked up the courage to broach the matter with Liddy I found God was telling her exactly the same thing in no uncertain terms. I think Lid can live with that. It's the rest of it that is going to be both hard & exciting.

I've said before, Liddy's a planner. She's known for years she'd be heading overseas. She has planned accordingly, saved diligently, incurred no debt with her end firmly in mind. This is sensible, smart & worldly thinking. Ouch. God is systematically stripping all her self made props away. He is making it very, very clear Liddy is to rely on Him for all her needs. You have no idea how difficult this is for someone like Liddy!

It does not get better. Money, one of the sticking points for getting overseas; we thought OM wanted Liddy's other church to support. I do not think this is what God wants ~ & as I pointed out to Liddy, God has been placing person after person in her life who has pledged monetary support. Oooh so much scarier! In all the upset & uncertainty of Liddy leaving her secure employment it is becoming apparent there are to be no *things* that will tie Liddy to Oz. Not cars. Not possessions. Not pets. Not friends. Not boyfriends. I think she gets to keep us. Lucky Lid!

I said I thought she needed to reread God's Smuggler just now. She wants to know what's wrong with ordinary? Plenty of people head off to be missionaries without the sort of hoo~ha Lid's going through. Ordinary's good. What the Lord seems to be showing me is something extraordinary & just so Liddy it almost makes me smile.

I am glad I am not Liddy. The weight of the Lord's hand is between her shoulder blades just now but after weeks when we have not been able to discern a clear direction ahead it is finally clear it is one step at a time as the Lord leads. Liddy is a leader, not a follower, so you can imagine for yourselves how well this is sitting with her!

What's more, I can stop breathing fire & brimstone to myself because God Himself has pointed out she needs a time of prayer & fasting. There is now a sense of peace, as if things have settled of their own accord. Liddy is stepping out in Faith in ways that many Christians never experience, or experience only in small ways. Psalm 32: 8 [I will instruct thee & teach thee in the way which thou shalt go; I will counsel thee with my eye upon thee.] is for Liddy just now.

The discipline of the Lord is very personal, very intimate, very thorough. It is a measure of His love for His children, an assurance that we are indeed His. It is not a punishment, but preparation for what lies ahead, trials & tribulations that we can not foresee but that the Lord knows all about & prepares us for before beforehand. It is a blessing in disguise. One day Liddy will look back on this time & go, Ahhh! So that's what it was all about. I learnt so much. God taught me so carefully. Indeed.